Walked outside the bar on a quite night last night, saw a hot chick outside next door on her phone (just finishing).

The perfect opportunity if ever there was one to go and chat to a chick.

And yet I waited those 3 seconds and didn’t act! Dammit!!!!!!

First I rolled up to my local and hung out with some friends, including a chick I know is single. Anyway, I think things are good between me and her – though it’s up to me to take it further now and show intent. I gave her a kiss on the cheek as she left.

The kiss on the cheek is not something Americans have to worry about. They rarely do it, more often do a hug. But a man going for a kiss on the cheek separates the alphas from the betas. It’s a simple test that shows you to be a man or a chump. And yet I suck at such social ettiquette things…normally.

There’s another chick I saw a couple days ago too. I am pretty sure she is single too. And what’s more, we share a lot in common, although she is not my usual “type”. Nevertheless, she is cute. Once again, it’s up to me to progress things along now.

And later last night I also caught up with another chick I’ve met and chatted to before. This chick has a fantastic personality, very bubbly, very outgoing, very cool but nice girl. I saw her at her workplace as I was passing by. We had a small chat in front of others – it felt like the spotlights were on me and her but I was just enjoying the moment. We’ll definitely be meeting again although I don’t know if she is single – I think she is because I have not heard about a “boyfriend” yet in her conversations.

Which brings me full circle back to the chick I had one-itis for. Seen her again lately. I have to say, I am going off her just a little now. On the one hand she always brings a smile and raises the mood. But she admitted to me that she hides many emotional problems. I prefer a girl without baggage but its not a deal-breaker. But lately I’ve been noticing the differences rather than the many similarities between us. No big deal – I have other fish to catch now…

Oh, I also chatted to a chick at the bar. Actually, she had already pissed off the other people there (something I won’t go into now) but nevertheless I “used” her for practice

I still see her from time to time in a situational way.

Actually, in recent days I have kino’d her a bit more.

Still, I think I am past the sex worthiness stage and now just “a friend”. Any moves could be seen as desperation on my part.

I said I would play it cool. Well, I need to play it even cooler! Basically forget about this chick.

Speaking of which, there was another chick last night I met. There was a certain je ne sais quoi about her. I was kinda cock-blocked though by some klingon guy.

In fact, I would love to get another chick just to increase the attraction of this original chick. But that would be a bit harsh to chick no.2, using her as bait. This is why I need to get rid of my thoughts of attraction for chick no.1 – so I can move on and play the field!

Any tips for me to lose this chick out of my head? Please leave a comment if you have any. Thanks

Right now, as you know, I have my eye on a certain someone. But there are also a few other chicks that I see on a regular basis where I like to hang out.

I enjoy chatting to them, making eye contact, smiling and so on. But have I shown them that I’m a sex-worthy guy? Probably not.

For one, I need a new wardrobe. A bad wardrobe is like holding out a sign saying “AFC”. Unfortunately, money is a big problem for me right now so there is little I can do about this for a short while.

Of course it’s also about attitude and especially confidence as well – that’s something that can only evolve I hope, especially through practice.

Anyway, a bit of a rambling post but I hope you see what I mean. Don’t become the “friend”, become the “lover”. It’s possible that my chance with one of the chicks has gone because I have spent several hours in her company now and it may be too late. But for the others there is still some hope

So two days ago I saw a couple of chicks, much younger than I normally go for. But I thought, what the hell, let’s just try it out. Of course, I did not dwell on it before (else I would not have made the approach) but it also made for a very uncoordinated approach.

But I learned a great deal:

• Use a routine! I did not bother and asked the usual dumb questions “where are you from” etc.
• Don’t approach head-on, use Mystery’s techniques of talking over the shoulder, body-rocking (as if to leave soon) etc.

The funny thing is, I didn’t care at all because these girls were not my type (they should be someone else’s though, and were not ugly). I think I will try to channel these feelings for the next approaches because it could be useful to recreate the feeling of “not caring”.

Here’s to more approaches in the near future!

Also, the chick I mentioned before, who I have probably had some case of “one-itis” for, I have definitely decided to stop pursuing her actively.

The reasons are as follows:

• passed the point where she knows enough about me already (4 to 6 hours of company) and I have not shown any sexual intent.
• age gap.

I have been meeting more people but I need to be more aggressive about it. A friend of mine mentioned that there is a wild Friday and Saturday night at a place I have eaten dinner at before. Apparently at night time it transforms into a “meat market” style drinking hole!

So really should be no problem for approaches although I will probably be going alone because I don’t know anyone else who would be into going. Speaking of which, I need to find some local PUA clubs to go hunting with a wingman.

In this new town I’m in, I normally hang out with a few people but then return home by a specific time. But these days I am staying out longer. To the point where I stayed out until 5am for the last two nights.

I met a lot of new people during the course of this weekend. I think this is a prelude to my “social transformation”: going from a guy who likes “quiet nights in” to going out 4 times a week.

In my opinion, “quiet nights in” are total BS. They are for people who want that comfort zone and do not want to challenge themselves and live life on the edge. That used to be me and is a skin I am shedding.

Case in point I have something planned coming up soon that is otherwise out of character for myself (think of a tattoo or something). This has shocked a number of people but I don’t care and it’s all part of my individual transformation that I have started to put into progress.

I saw “the chick” again yesterday, I did not expect that. Her boyfriend was there the last time which was a bit weird – it felt like he could maybe detect our “vibe” (is the vibe just in my head or does she feel it too? I have no idea).

I don’t care too much because I know that one-itis is bad. So I will keep going full steam ahead looking for other opportunities. Please give me your positive energy for success in my efforts

He told me:

When you go after a woman, don’t tell everybody

I have the annoying habit of telling people everything about me. I have also been very bad with secrets and gossip in the past although that has now changed.

It’s due to my personality. I like to see people’s reactions. But something I am trying to do more and more these days is to not seek approval from others (am I doing this, I don’t know).

Good Advice

I can see why my friend’s advice is good. If you tell other people you have a crush on someone then it kind of takes a little bit of your “power” away, so to speak.

If you keep it within, I get more of that “lone hunter” type feeling inside. Maybe this is a more successful strategy?

What do you think? Leave a comment below with your thoughts.

Thanks

Actually that’s not 100% accurate.

• I have NEVER been skinny.
• I have never had a flat stomach since adolescence.
• I have had a small gut since then but most people would say I looked “normal”.
• Last 5 to 10 years I have battled with my weight.
• 3 months ago I was just entering the official obese category (I don’t see myself as obese though).
• I have lost almost 25 lbs in the last 3 months.

I know that losing weight is not the answer to everything but if you’re unhappy about your weight then surely losing some of it will help, right?

I bring this up because yesterday I heard there was a party of cute chicks in a nearby venue. All I had to do was walk there and talk to them, it is a really fun place anyway. But I made some “excuses” as my friend pointed out.

I am almost done with losing weight. Then I can start to buy new clothes. Currently I wear a pair of old shoes (OK I can replace those now), some oversized jeans, T-shirts and a crappy >5 year old jacket that badly needs replacing. But I’m putting off buying clothes for about a month, see if I can lose any more weight in the interim.

What do you think? Am I making excuses? Is how you look important to yourself and others? Just leave a comment below.

Lots of things are competing for my time at the moment so I have not yet had a chance.

But nevertheless I saw a chick again last night I’ve had my eye on for a while. She is pretty but not “model looks”. She also has a great personality. She has a boyfriend too but that could mean anything and although they are living together, she does not sound 100% happy with him.

What I am planning to do is work on my approaches with other women and if I can grab this girl in the long term then all the better. I have tried a few “techniques” on her but these are normally for chicks you have just met or have only known for a short time. They did not seem to work well so I am just going to be totally natural and totally unneedy for her, we will see how things go – in any case she would make for an excellent female friend anyway.